Confessions and a Ramble About Latex and Zombies and Spoons

I have something I need to admit.

I have the attention span of an ADD child hyped up on Halloween candy, in a situation where laser pointers are involved.

Oh yes. It’s a terrible affliction. I just spent five minutes fondly contemplating laser pointers and how much they excite me, a nineteen year old college student. And not at all because they’re bright mystical moving lights.

They’re also the caveman equivalent to lightsabers.

I had a transition but I got distracted by a person coming into the room where I’m eating, plus the realization that an actor I recognize was on the television. Also there’s a fly buzzing about.

Anyway, the point is, I’m terrible at the whole attention span thing. In previous years, it wasn’t so bad, because I was living in the same town for years, in the same house, in the same state, surrounded by the same people. It’s hard to be overly distracted by something old and familiar. Now however, I’m in this huge, sprawling city, in a new environment, with new people, living in a new place…my brain pretty much constantly short circuits itself in the attempt to pay attention to everything at once. To make it even better(worse?) I live in a hotel, where there are conventions and bridal showers and receptions and limos constantly milling about.

In fact, half of the reason I made this blog was in the hopes it would ground my attention back from where ever it went and had an LSD rave, to the areas I need it to focus itself. …I think my logic was alittle shaky. What am I supposed to do? Everytime I feel myself spiraling into distraction zone (Like this weekend, where I spent 90% of my weekend mindlessly reading MSPaintAdventures) scream “I AM GETTING UNFOCUSED!” and write a blog post? No idea. 

I actually have several half written blog posts, all of which will eventually be finished. They’re about my experience having Canadian Thanksgiving with Boyfriend’s family, Greyhound Bus Trips, School and Other Delightful Things. I keep getting distracted in the middle of writing them.

This will not happen this blog post.

Because I’m about to blow your minds with a transition-connector-thing spanning several paragraphs.

….

So I went Halloween shopping this weekend.

It was pretty crazy. If I wasn’t jobless and stressed about money, I probably would have bought like…fifty costumes and accessories. I really wanted to buy myself a flapper wig. But they only had blonde ones. …Also I’m being fiscally responsible. (cough)

Anyway, Boyfriend and I decided to dress up as something together for this trick-or-treat-for-canned-foods thing his club does. After cruelly shooting down my suggestions of Horse, Cow, Cowgirl-and-soon-to-be-branded-Cow, Snuffalufagus, and Elmo; we settled on being Scary!Ghosts. We felt very original, despite my mother snarking on it slightly when I told her over the phone.

But anyway, we decided to do awesome makeup and latex and such. I, being a film geek and theater major, know how to do such makeup. Boyfriend does not know the horrors that he is subjugating himself to. He doomed himself as soon as this discussion happened:

Boyfriend: So I think we should go all out, and try to be scary. Maybe we could do some sort of makeu--
Me: *odd vacant expression* I know how to do makeup.
Boyfriend: *oblivious to Doom* That’s cool, so I think for the costumes…

See, to my terribly insane brain, that blerp right there means Boyfriend gives me all rights to the makeup department. I now have the power. All of it. 

That leads me to Yesterday, where in the golden hours of the afternoon I journeyed to the Tops Plaza, where both a Target, and the biggest, baddest Party Land ever resides.

This Party Land was having a huge Halloween bash, and when I walked in, I could easily see I was spending the rest of my day there. About 60% of the store had become Halloween-centric. Everything was there. Costumes, costumes, a wall of pictures of costumes to ORDER, wigs, shoes, candy, silly string. It was amazing.

More pertinent to my situation, there was a wall of make up supplies. Anything I might have desired. I was so terribly overwhelmed I had to leave, and consult my friend, Fox. Being a Halloween lover, she helped assist me (by that I mean she listened to me ramble nigh incoherently and waited for me to leave so she could play her games without me in her ear) while I boggled at the choices and probably annoyed everyone around me with the indecision. “Should I get the zombie kit? We’re gonna be ghosts, but it has useful stuff…” “Which is better Fox, Latex or this Skin Wax stuff? I think I’m better at dealing with latex, but I don’t know…What is this Creepy Skin jar? What type of make up should I get?”

But that’s okay, because there were screaming kids in the vicinity, and they were yelping at an octave high enough that I glared at my uterus threateningly and swore that if it ever decided to try and spawn such a high pitched creature, I would become severely angry. And you wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.

Anyway, I managed to get away buying less than 20 bucks worth of make up. Though I’ll need to go back, as upon arriving in my hotel dorm, I greedily opened my stuff and began experimenting to see how much would be needed. To my defense, it was NECESSARY. I wanted to see how to best hollow out my cheeks. Then I got bored and turned half my face into a giant bruise. Then I got distracted because my oatmeal was ready for consumption and I wanted to look at the care package my mother sent me and then I remembered I needed to do laundry.

So I walked out of my room and to the laundry room, with apparently a very convincing bruise on my face.

People looked positively horrified. 

I looked really confused, then touched my face and felt the makeup.

Then I felt terrible for getting distracted and forgetting that I made myself look like the victim of a mugging.

At least my neighbors didn’t see me. They probably would’ve recollected some intense, serious-business threats along the lines of “I will kill you with a spoon, you evil bastard” being tossed between Boyfriend and myself during a noble war of tickling, fleeing and counter-tickling. Also shampoo-bottle-throwing (he wasn't playing fair). And six foot tall Boyfriends getting sick of this shit and picking up their loud, flailing five foot tall girlfriends and tossing them in the vicinity of the bed to get the flailing girlfriends out of the “I will stab you with plastic spoons threateningly” radius. 

Things would have been mad awkward then.

Greetings Internet!

"On a dark and rainy night, a college student sat freezing in her dorm room and decided that blogging would be much more fun than blankly staring at a blinking underscore that cheerfully reminded her that her contributions to the essay had been her name, an awkward title and several spaces. For a flourishing dramatic use of white space. Or something like thing."

And so it begins.

Hi! I'm me. Here on the blog you may refer to me as "Reller" or the Mighty And Fierce Alyraptor. Perhaps as you gain experience and level up, you'll be granted access to more names.

Zing.

Not even one whole paragraph and I'm tossing out geeky remarks right and left. I feel your willingness to keep reading evaporate. WILL CHECK.

Ahahahaha.

At least I didn't make a Chuck Norris joke. And I totally could have. Eff Why Eye.

So, I, a humble denizen of the webbernets decided to make a blog. So before I leap into tangled rambles that leave people wondering what sort of awkward crazy being could have written such nonsense, I shall introduce you to the crazy person. ...In simpler words: "I'ma make an intro post".

I'm a college student. I moved from a small town in Missouri to the much larger city of Buffalo. Many people ask me why. I really don't have a simple answer for that. After all, Buffalo is windy, cold and the cars try to gun me down with terrifying persistence. The whole story of how on earth I ended up in Buffalo is quite the tale, and another blog entirely. But for most people, and for right now you, I just shrug awkwardly and say "I felt like it was the place to be for now".

Then I pay for my coffee and wander away wondering how that conversation even started.

I am currently a Theater major, though despite being a Sophomore (really a weird Freshman/Sophomore/Transfer hybrid) I've been an English Major (Psychology minor) and very briefly a double major for English and Psychology. I have several passions in terms of academia. Theater is one of them, and really it's just supposed to be a "for this year" major before I switch to become a Film and TV major. But who knows how that will go. The more I'm in Theater classes, the more I remember how much I like it. I'm silly like that.

Back home, in the relatively small town known only because of the university chilling there, I left behind quite a large family. Not in the "I have eight brothers and five sisters" big. That would be grounds for crossing the Atlantic. It's more of....My grandmother, aunts, uncle, and cousins and family friends all clustered around this one town. We're secretly vying for domination. But Shhhh, don't tell.

Also left behind is a nice handful of friends, stories of which will most likely pop up now and again. One of which is a certain Fox. No, not in the "a vaguely slutty vixen at the bar eying you over a martini" definition of Fox. That's just her name. She's a part of the reason I ended up here, typing away a rambling summary of Me at 9:30 pm.

Luckily, I'm not totally alone and isolated up here though. Slightly across the border is the Boyfriend, and his family, who do their best to make sure I don't die in the city. There is also the Roommate, who doubts my sanity on a daily basis. But I don't blame her. She's a Nutrition major. How is she supposed to know what to do when I start improving with myself or speaking in gibberish? I'm personally just glad she hasn't attempted homicide yet.

ANYWAY.


(That was my excuse of a transition. Spiffy, eh?)

I suppose, as a sort of warning, I'll briefly wander over the dangerous waters of "My Interests".

I love video games. Oh, how I love them. Specifically, I'm a bit of a rabid fan of Silent Hill. It's scary, it has zombies, it has plot and PSYCHOLOGICAL ELEMENTS?! I eat that stuff up. There's also the typical games that frequent the hearts of geeks everywhere, as well as a few odd cases. But I think Silent Hill is the one I'd mention the most. So. There you have it.

As a subnote, I also love graphic novels and comic books. Especially Batman. Mmm, grit.

My favorite author is usually Neil Gaiman. I say usually, because sometimes I'll be reading a series and decide THEY are the most awesome thing since sliced bread. But it usually goes back to Gaiman. J.K Rowling was the first author I ever worshiped, and Jim Butcher is the one I'm currently devouring the books of. Literally. I haven't read this fast in years. Serious props to him. Also to the Boyfriend for finding him for me.

I'm also a film geek. I grew up on movies. I believe one of my all time favorites is Jurassic Park, featuring the eyecandy called "Jeff Goldblum's Voice". That leads me to dinosaurs. I love them. I have a plush velociraptor named Moe, who is the guardian of my bed and sleeps with me when Boyfriend isn't accidentally throwing him in the laundry hamper.

I watch television, but not that frequently. Dollhouse was my great love (recently) and then it died. I still haven't completely recovered. Fringe however is and has been my favorite show in a long time and the only one to repeatedly tear me up.

I roleplay. Both online and tabletop. I wish I could find a LARP to join, but alas. Buffalo isn't that cool. Or it's holding back on me.

And finally, I had a long history as a Debate and Speech competitior in high school. It still holds a lot of weight in my life. And definitely fleshed out the stubborn, competitive bitch in me.

But that's another story.

And to close this long ramble, I welcome you to this blog, and bid you farewell for now.

See you soon!